Workout Dissatisfaction

My schedule changed recently and I have less time to devote to my workout schedule. I decided that I should start working out twice a week. I began searching for a two day a week workout, maybe with an optional third day. Google led me to this workout on AskMen.com. On the face of it, this workout seems like it would be perfect for what I am proposing. But only on the face of the situation - for whatever reason the bench press is one of my weakest lifts, so I need more than three sets of bench press in a week to feel as if I am doing any effective upper body work.
I think I am going to try something like this POWERLIFTING. The caps lock thing was an accident but it seemed appropriate. I've done some cursory research and I am impressed by the anecdotal tales of athletic prowess among Olympic powerlifters - 42 inch vertical leaps, out-running sprinters at 25 meters, and a 6'3" 325 lbs man dunking a basketball. If I weighed 325 lbs I wouldn't be able to tie my shoes much less dunk a basketball.
From now on I think my workout routine is going to look like this:

• Barbell Bench Press 6-8 repetitions, 3 sets.
• Squats 6-8 repetitions, 3 sets. (substitute leg press or Smith Machine if knee pain increases)
  
• Deadlifts 6-8 repetitions, 3 sets.
  
• Power Cleans 3-5 repetitions, 3 sets.
• Push Press 3-5 repetitions, 3 sets.
• Dips/Pullup Supersets 10 repetitions, 3 sets.
• Squat jumps 3 repetitions, 3 sets. (never more than 50% of one rep max)
  
• Incline Crunch 20-30 repetitions, 5 sets. (or variations to target obliques)

This routine would limit rest between sets to 1 minute and I should probably start using weight belts and wraps. I would start with very light weights in all the new lifts. I would never do this routine on consecutive days, but I would attempt to go to the gym as many times during a week as possible. Of course, if I didn't have the energy I wouldn't bother. I'd do a five minute warm-up and a short cool-down. I'd try to run on my off days. I'd also try to finish everything in an hour and fifteen minutes.
It's worth a shot...
Or I could get fat and blame it on the training I am doing as a line medic with Able Company again.
I am also including a link to power lifters amazing athletic feats.