Is Saddam dead?

I sure hope so. I can't find anything using google saying anything about the most recent news. Television says he may have been hit yet again though. This is the most recent story about Saddam being dead on the web. Daypop thinks this is the most relevant story about Saddam's death in the blogosphere. (Whatever happened to blogodex?) No article on the web has any of the most recent information, but the US acquired some intelligence placing Saddam in a building with his son and other top Iraqi officials and destroyed said building, rendering anybody still inside very dead. All anybody is willing to confirm at the moment is that the people inside the building are dead.

Schoolgirl Crush

I am to the point with certain girls in my gym class that kindness has reached the end of its usefulness and cruelty might be in order. I actually had one caress the back of my head and neck today. The girls all seem to think that they can get away with whatever they want to. I think I should paint some gray into my hair, stuff a pillow into my gut and slouch a little. All the teachers mistake me for a student and the kids seem to know most of the time but they don't treat me better. At this point I am beginning to feel like a student. I might go and sit in a class by mistake tomorrow.

Raining Cats and Dogs

Hail was coming down a few minutes ago in Richardson like the wrath of God. My roommate most likely has a ruined windshield on his car. Other than that, we sustained minimal damage. Extreme weather turns my roommates into children, which is fine really. A certain wonderment about the world should be encouraged. For whatever reason, half-inch hail has no mystery or excitement for me. I think it has something to do with being worried that the pelting hail will dent my tender flesh. I mean it only breaks windows...

Heavy Lifting

I am trying to get in shape for the military so I am stepping up my workouts and my lower body workout in particular. This comes at great calorie cost. Today I killed 1,900 calories in about 35 minutes of working out. I also lifted weights so there is no telling what my actual energy consumption was. My aim is too catch up my endurance and leg strength to the rest of my physique. I am hoping it works.

Crazy Kids

Middle school kids are crazy. Seventh and eight graders vary widely in size, have raging hormones, are just discovering the meaning of sex, and never think far enough ahead to see the consequences of their actions.
There is a little spanish girl who is in one of my gym classes who last time I was here inquired on a hypothetical basis whether I'd suck her toes. This week, she told me my legs looked sexy in shorts. (In fact, I have had three different girls comment on my legs. Maybe it's time for long pants?) Another girl ran into the boy's lockerroom; she also commented on my legs. (Are we seeing a pattern here?) Another girl who I had taught in a home economics (well now they call it "life skills") class I subbed for last semester whistled at me and commented on my legs as I walked the halls. Last time I was hear she told me she'd given another teacher a lapdance and always had something shocking to say or do as I passed her in the hall. And that's just the little (or not so little) hispanic girls. I had one girl (not hispanic) come into class with her pants pulled down way past what is normally considered decent so that her underwear showed. I immediately ordered her to pull up her pants. She immediately replied she had to keep them down because she had lost a bet to her cousin. And that is just the girls.
There is a young black kid in one of my gym classes who has received two referrals for fighting in the locker room in three days. His temper is bigger than he is, and he's not much bigger than a chihuahua. I teach boys who apparently believe that there is never a reason horseplay is not acceptable behavior. I work with boys whose behavior problems run so deep, and are so belligerent that I really expect to see their faces on a most-wanted poster some day. And that's just third period.

Another Day in the Life

I have had no less than two teachers mistake me for a middle school student. It doesn't help that I am wearing a t-shirt, shorts, and running shoes. I could argue that I am taller but all the jocks in my 7th period gym class are just as tall.
I am posting from the library of Thomas C. Marsh Middle School where I am going to be teaching gym for a little while. I feel a little guilty having this much fun on the job. I have a good time but the kids less so since I actually make them work out. They all complain that they were supposed to play in gym class. I am. :)

Fat and Happy

I am happy at the moment and mostly because I am well-fed. I also really like teaching physical education. This is one of those rare days that you sit back and say "Life is good."

Scenarios of Gloom and Doom

The current buzz in the media is that the war isn't going great now and is soon to be worse. I would like to believe differently but frankly I don't have enough real information to say otherwise. I can only think of past wars that the media and scattered voices in the defense community said similar things. At the same time these people only need to be right once. Josh Marshall has the most complete and frightening prediction of failure in Iraq yet. Even so, a close reading of his blog post reveals the prediction isn't for military defeat but failure to complete the war objectives. The scenarios are actually more frightening from an Iraqi perspective because all of them predict great suffering in Iraq and one predicts near complete devastation.

War Blogging

Where is Raed? He hasn't posted in a couple of days. Is the power out, the telephone lines down, or is he dead? Who knows. We'll have to wait.
By the way, if you are not getting at least some of your opinion coverage on the war from slate.com, you are missing out - especially if you are a &*$@ liberal.

Quick Link

Good stuff from Will Saletan at Slate about why staying out of Baghdad was the right thing to do.
I still wish that we had killed Saddam by "accident" the first time.

What would you do if you were God?

You know what nobody has said, (that I know of) is that the justification for war could be reduced to "Because we can". There exists a giant power vacuum and the United States is slowly realizing the implications. The US can use this moment in history to shape the future as it pleases. Honestly, given the power it is ridiculous to not expect America to use it. If you had the ability to make the world a better place could you resist the urge to try? If you were Superman could you resist becoming a vigilante? If you were Superman would you have any moral course of action other than vigilantism? What would you say if Superman sat idly by while evil men caused havok and destruction in the world? What have people said about God for allegedly doing the same?
The danger should be obvious by now. America is powerful but not invulnerable. America is intelligent but not all-knowing. America is well-intentioned but not infallible. How can we be sure that the US will always be guided by the better nature of its leaders, especially since America has been governed by convenience in the past. This is where international law should step in and provide guidance. Unfortunately, leadership at the international level has been lacking. Ask yourself why a powerful nation should trust an organization to protect it's interests and the interest of smaller nations - because it is effective, benevolent and fair. The United Nations is none of these things. The United Nations is powerless to govern its member nations (witness the number of nations with alleged civil rights violations on the Security Council for instance) and unwilling to enforce it own rules. The UN is the problem. War isn't the solution but I have yet to see a better alternative.

What do you do

When your down or a little depressed what do you do? Eat? Sleep? Watch TV? I do something you have to be 21 and older to do in most states. I have talked to other people about this and you would be surprised at the extreme things people do when they are depressed. I am just thankful that the vice I picked up doesn't result in immediate physical harm - well at least it shouldn't.
I was in a little bit of a tailspin from the conversation I had with my Dad the other day until my Dad called me and told me he loved me regardless of whether he agreed with me. I couldn't ask for more.

Kissing Halle

Adrien Brody is a smart man. His actions also mean beautiful women will be on their guard at award shows. Oh Well...

Father-Son Chats

Why can't I be like other people?
I had a chat with my Dad today about joining the Army. He was not pleased, and will remain ill-pleased with me quite some time. One of his protests was that I was throwing away my college education. I beg to differ but I also didn't feel like wasting my breath trying to convince him otherwise. My dad is an opinionated person and the best adjective to describe his disposition during an argument is "implacable". I just don't like the feeling that I am wasting my breath talking to somebody about as yielding as a brick wall.

War News

I continue to monitor the war with a kind of sick fascination. I actually hate hearing about it now but curiousity won't let me rest. The reports of Iraqi troops executing US POWS and using civillians to provide cover anger me. I found an excellent war blog called The Command Post. Very up to the minute and more than you could ever want to know about the new War in Iraq. I also found a link to further evidence that the French suck. I actually think we should let them have some role in post-war Iraq, despite my anger at them. At least that way, America doesn't have to pay for everything.

In a happier note, how about those Mavericks!

Racism and Sexism in Education

I was guilty of bigotry today in the classroom. A big athletic black kid walked into the classroom for the eighth period of the class I was substituting for. As a substitute, you learn to identify troublemakers and this boy fit the stereotype to a T. The children I have the most discipline problems with in the classroom are usually black, male, athletic or all three. At first he did nothing to allay my suspicions, talking and laughing fairly loudly. However, when class started, I forgot all about him. I got so tied up dealing with the other students that I didn't notice him, which is a good thing. (at least from my standpoint since I don't know what his grades are like) Toward the end of class I realized how well behaved he had been and was a little surprised. I even commended him on it. Of course, it could easily have been a fluke, and the kid could be a perfect monster.
The situation does illuminate certain things that have been said to me in the past and an opportunity that exists for me. People expect young black men to be irresponsible, disrespectful, and dumb. Any black male who is responsible, respectful, or intelligent is a rare find. I understand now why people have congratulated me for (apparently anyway) being all three. In fact, I am told the Army still operates according to a de facto quota system so I can expect to move up since my superiors will be desperately searching for qualified black men to fill positions. It is a little awkward but I intend to take advantage of it. I could be ashamed I gained advantage due to my race, but children of wealthy family gain advantage due to their social standing, so why not me? Oh well, whatever, race is always awkward for me to deal with.

Continued War Coverage!

I don't like watching the war on television. There is a surreal quality to watching explosions and realizing that unlike the movies, people actually die when you watch explosions on live television. Hearing the report of how the Iraqis executed several of our soldiers after taking them hostage nearly incited me to willful acts of violence. Only, I can't revenge myself against the perpetrators. War is a maddening thing and now it's closer to me than it has ever been before. Facing the reality of war is like staring at a horrible unblinking eye of death. I don't want to see but I can't look away and I keep getting closer and closer... Only when I get close I can see that the eye is really a gaping maw with curved, predatory teeth. Can't you imagine it - bloody gums and teeth dripping saliva, the remains of past victims, and present victims struggling to escape what cannot be escaped?
Did I ever mention that I have a vivid overactive imagination? I am sure that nothing can be as horrible as what I can conjure in my head and I am hoping that if I ever participate in combat that I'll be able to lose myself in the adrenalin rush and the chaos. I don't want time to think. I do however want time to sleep...

War what is it good for?

I read about the war in Iraq with special interest now. The "Shock and Awe" portion of the war has begun and I gather that the Iraqis are properly "shocked" and "awed". Saddam is either dead or injured and apparently exerting no control over his battered war machine. I look on soberly, knowing that soon I will begin training to join the attacking army that has unleashed this shockingly effective wave of destruction. I am joining an organization that exists to bring destruction and death to its enemies. My anxiety is slightly mitigated by the fact that I my job will be to provide emergency medical care. I am going to be protecting life in the valley of death. It's comfortingly contrary.
Did I say I was anxious? I am worried but I am also proud and excited. I have gone from being appalling unproductive to being a soldier, (beware! cliched marketing speech follows!) an army of one. Even better, I won't be an army of destruction, but an army of life and hope.
Somebody please stop me next time I wax poetic.

New Day

I have never felt as much urgency to live my life with purpose as I do now. I feel as if every action, even to what I watch on television, has a significant influence on my future. I feel as if up to this point I had been pretending, wasting my time and other people's money; I was just playing - having a good time at everyone elses expense. Now, I will be responsible for other people's safety - in fact responsible for the safety of the world. I have a grand purpose now and as a result my lesser goals feel less frivolous, less randomly chosen. I am proud to be in the Army.

In The Army Now!

I swore in to the Army yesterday around 3:30 pm.

Peace, Peace, But There Is ...

My biggest beef with those who oppose action in Iraq and cry for peace is that they have no alternative solutions. I'd willingly back any effective solution not involving war. Shoot, I'd even back the one proposed by Jonathan Alter. It's a little crazy but it is extremely bold. (I like that!) It won't happen because there isn't anyone in the UN or in the peace movement with the brains and boldness to actually carry out a real solution. The peace movement is irrelevant just like the UN.